Losing Myself

So, I'm realizing that I'm getting terrible at keeping a blog. My Tumblr is doing great, but that's only because it's not really meant for long blog posts, though I've posted a few of those as well.

Quite a bit has happened in the month since I last said howdy to you lot. I've been struggling to write as much as I need to for Camp NaNoWriMo. Thankfully, I don't really have much of a social life anymore to get in my way. It's just dancing and volunteering that have stopped me from being ahead. Well, that and my own mind. I'm working on three different projects this month, which is a bit more of a struggle than it really ought to be.

I realized a couple of days ago that in all the rush and craziness of my everyday life, I've started to lose track of what's important to me. I've been so worried about if I'll be able to do everything that everyone else wants me to do that I forgot that my own dreams need to come first. Between my dancing and my writing, I know what I want to do with my life. Everyone else has other plans for me, though.

Go to college, get a real job, don't waste your time on such trivial pursuits. I hear this all the time, and the constant barrage makes me wonder if I'm making the right decisions by following my dreams. Sure, I intend to go back to college and get my degree, but the timing is off. I know I'm capable of handling the workload, but it means I'll be losing every bit of a social life I've managed to gain. And yes, school is important. I'm not denying that, or the fact that I miss it, but I'm in no rush to go back just yet. I left for a reason. I needed to find myself.

The more I think about it, the more I realize that I'm going to have to make some tough decisions in the near future. I've got my whole life ahead of me to do some things, but other things... they're within my reach and there's no point in not going after them. If I let my dreams slip away, I'll only be losing myself.