Nepotism

Warning: This post will include rants, foul language, and a sense of sarcasm and possibly a sense of entitlement. Proceed with caution.

Nepotism- n. the practice among those with power or influence of favoring relatives or friends, especially by giving them jobs.


I am tired. More than tired, I am fed up with all the bullshit that goes around in the job market. Four rejection letters in as many days from places who list their requirements for job listing as simply being over eighteen, or having a high school diploma. I have even interviewed for a position, and received a generic "Thank you for your interest" email that did not even include my name.

Let me tell you a story about a job a friend and I both applied for. His father was drinking buddies with the manager of the place in question, but he had no work experience, was still in high school. Me, I have some college, and volunteer experience. Guess who was offered the job? Not me. This is a prime example of nepotism in the workplace.

I have been hunting for a job for almost two years now, and in all that time, I have only been offered a single job, which I felt I needed to turn down because of the nature of the position. I did not feel safe performing the job offered. Moreover, the interviewer had spent the entire time staring at my breasts. And you want to know the sad part? Another friend of mine recommended me for the job.

Everyone tells me I can always go back to college, to get my degree, but it won't help. I know it won't. When McDonald's tells you that you aren't qualified to flip burgers all day, something in you just knows that it's not you that's the problem. It's the system. It's not what you can do. It's who you know. Guess what, though? I'm sick of it. There reaches a point when it's time to say enough is enough. That point is today.

Today, I make a vow... We can end nepotism. It won't happen overnight, or even over the next year, but we can end it. Together. How? Simple. Don't let them push you around. Don't let them push you away. If you're an employer, don't hire someone just because you know them. Hire them because they're qualified for the position and because you think they'll do a good job in the position. If you're looking, don't jump at the job your friend offers you simply because he's your friend. Unless we work together, we will not be able to end this favoritism that plagues us.

It's My Life (I'll Believe What I Want)

Typically, I try to be a very calm person.  Try was the keyword in that sentence.  Typically, I manage to succeed, until idiots surround me or someone attempts to tell me that what I believe is wrong.  Let's back up a little.

For those of you who don't know, I'm not fond of being told what to do... or what to believe.  I never have been and I never will be.  I have some wonderful words that I use when someone wants to tell me I'm wrong.  "Prove it."  It's a challenge, and most people fail to bring the proof.  I especially love when someone likes to try to use the Bible as scientific proof.

Now, I'm not saying that there isn't some truth in the Bible.  It's a brilliant history book, to a point.  When arguing that fossilized evidence isn't valid, though, don't bring religion into it.  I don't care if you're Catholic, Wiccan, or otherwise.  Science and religion have been proven not to mix well.  Galileo was a wonderful example of this.  His (then) radical ideas managed to get him arrested.

No, I'm not saying that there isn't a higher power--don't even get me started.  What I am saying, though, is that thanks to being an American, I'm allowed to believe what I want.  I'm allowed to practice whatever religion I feel like.  If I suddenly feel the urge to worship a shoe as a higher power, I can do that!  I might get laughed at, sure, but that is totally within my rights.

So, let this be a warning to everyone who wants to tell me what to believe.  I will believe what I want and say what's on my mind.  There's nothing you can do about it.  It's also well within your right to tell me I'm wrong, to tell me that I'm not a good person, and to attempt to change my mind.  However, don't expect me to stick around to see what happens.  I'm not lost.  I'm just on a different path.

Human

It seems fitting I finish up this month's blogs with a post about how flawed people, myself included, are.  Spring is a time to clean out the old issues and welcome the dawning of a new year, a new chance at life.  Summer brings us the chance to grow as people, to find ourselves, and hope we don't lose people along the way.

Over the past month, I've come to terms with a lot.  I've lost friends, made new ones, and grown as a person.  I'm still flawed, and I always will be.  I long ago accepted that I'm nowhere close to perfect.  Self-pity?  Yeah, I feel it.  Anger, depression, pride?  Yeah, I suffer from those emotions as well.  However, I work hard to overcome the negativity in my life.  I try very hard to let go of the past, and to learn from my mistakes.

Very recently, I had a bit of a meltdown.  I called some people out on the way they were treating me and the backlash was horrific.  I was sick of the abuse I was taking from people who didn't even know me or what happens in my life.  People close to those people then took it upon themselves to let me know I'm a pathetic bitch.  Hey, I'll own up to that.  I only have one thing to say in my defense:  I am human.  I make mistakes.  Life isn't about everyone liking you.  It's not about pissing off everyone around you.  It's about making mistakes, learning from them, and trying to be a better person.

So here it is, my soul laid bare.  I'm a pathetic teenager who suffers from a horrible mental affliction called being human.  I'm too smart for my own good, I don't believe in false modesty, I make mistakes quite often, and I'm in love with my life.  I wouldn't change me for the world.

Haters Gonna Hate

Odd title, isn't it?  For me, at least, it is.  I try to avoid subjects where I'll be complaining about how I feel.  This is one of those rare occasions I'm going to give in, though.  For some reason, people look at me and don't think I take crap from anyone.  That's mostly right.

Ordinarily, I brush off the abuse I take from people for how I behave, how I dress, how I carry myself.  There are times, though, that I give in and let it get to me.  I'm still human, even if I don't let the words get to me.  I still feel even when I pretend I'm made of ice.  I call myself the Ice Queen for a reason.

There comes a point when it crosses a line.  It's cyberbullying when people attack one person for no reason.  I see a lot of this in one of the former Roleplay universes I still have characters alive in.  People will become vicious for no reason other than to be mean.  We're all human, I know, but having people attack for something innocent, even in character, crosses a line.

The sad part is, they don't do it to just one person.  They do it to each other, then those same people who were attacked before help those who attacked them with attacking someone else.  It saddens me to see that happen.  Why can't we all just get along?  I know it doesn't seem to be "human nature", but neither is defending the people who attack you.

So, I'll put this question for you.  Why do they do it?  Why do they make people feel small just because they can?

The answer is simply this... Because they can.  Because we let them get away with it.  Because no one has the guts to stand up and call them out on it.

I'm done taking the abuse.  I'm done letting them walk over me because they think they can.  I understand the in-character hating on my characters.  They aren't always likeable.  But don't carry it elsewhere.  Don't let it seep into your actual life because it becomes poison.

Invisible in a Sea of Faces

We've all been there.  We've all felt invisible.  Sometimes, we just can't help it.  We're overlooked by those we thought cared.  "Why?" we ask ourselves.  Why the hell are we the invisible ones?  What did we do to earn this?  More importantly, why don't they understand?

Here's the thing.  They do understand.  They've all been there, too.  Sometimes, we just don't want to believe it.  It's hard to accept that the same people who make us feel invisible also feel invisible.

For the past seventeen years, the only time I'm seen is when I'm dancing.  When I'm moving, I don't care if I can be seen.  I just want to forget.  Sometimes, it's painful to hold on to the feelings that I hide from the rest of the world.  The minute I'm on the dance floor, the rest of the world ceases to matter.  All that matters is my partner and the music.

Only one other person managed to change that.  Without him, I'd have sunk into a depression again.  Instead, he keeps me sane, keeps me from going over the deep end and never being able to find myself again.  The sad thing is... he lives too far away to spend time with.  I can't call him up when I'm on the verge of tears.  I have to wait until he gets online to tell him about how small I've been made to feel.

So yeah... Even if you feel invisible, please know you aren't the only one.  We've all been there.  We've all felt like this.  Some of us still feel that way.  Know this, though... no one can change it but you.

Disillusioned, or An Introduction

Ordinarily, I wonder in my sanity to decide to blog.  It's been something I've debated for several months.  However, over the last week, I have been pushed to finally post.  As some people who are possibly reading this, I constantly have strong opinions.  It is one of those opinions that brings me here now.
The Internet has been abuzz with news about the column written by Samantha Brick, asking why women hate her because she's attractive.  Ordinarily, I don't get involved in things like this.  I saw the article about the backlash on Yahoo! and wondered if it was a troll.  Out of sheer curiosity, I investigated.  What I found... it stunned me.

I knew that people can be very vicious, but I hadn't realized exactly how much a single column could turn the world against a woman.  Some of the comments I do agree with.  However, the reaction of the author... It was what truly stunned me.  Thanks to a wondrous search engine, I was able to find a trove of articles about the backlash and article in question.  Frankly, it all disgusted me.  It was not merely the reaction of the readers, but the desire of the author to post something like this in the first place.

Do we not have enough beautiful people?  Where did all the intelligent ones go?  I know I'm not the last teenage girl who couldn't care less about the way she's perceived.  However, as I look around me, I see people obsessed with the material objects that make our lives easier and the cosmetic side of human nature.  It made me realize something.  We've become vain.  Vanity has always been a part of human nature, but never has it extended quite this far.  We have our world famous celebrities, the ones we turn to for the latest fashions, the latest insipid comments Tweets.  What happened?

So, this is me, disillusioned with society.  An outsider among those who would rather not see the problems.  However, I'm happy to be who I am.  I am, and forever will be, merely, madly me.